Monday, February 14, 2011

So this is the entry I never wanted to write…

After almost exactly one year and one month after Dad passed, my mother passed away Sunday, Feb 13th in the early hours of the morning.  This may sound silly, but I’m so thankful for my crazy dog Tojo, because he KNEW what was going on.  He wouldn’t let me go to sleep because he kept whimpering next to mom.  I brought him to bed with me but he wouldn’t go to sleep, he just sat there looking at the door wanting to go back in the living room with mom.  And he’s definitely not the type of dog that doesn’t sleep at night:
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There’s not much to say about what happened, but she went peacefully, and two of the few things I understood her say Saturday was “I feel fine” and “I love you.”  Luckily Rocky was sleeping in mom’s room and slept all night.  I am so thankful Greg was here with me to help me through this, and Donna, Kelly, Carolyn B and the nurse from Covenant came over to help us.
I don’t see how mom dealt with this same thing with Dad for so long, and I wish I could have helped her more, but even though it was sooner than expected, I am glad that she is in a happier place, and she hurts no more.  Her and Dad are looking down on us, they’re up there playing golf again together and will always be in our hearts! Red heart
One of the hardest things was having to wake Rocky up and tell my brother that Mom had joined Daddy in heaven, and she is no longer in pain.  He had a good cry, but he and I know that he has so much support with me and Greg, his entire family, the Orange Beach Elementary family, Lee Drug Store family and friends. 
Yesterday was the longest day of my life.  I thank every one of you that came to visit, and made it easier on Rocky and me.  We’ve had SO much support and I know we will forever.  Rocky chose to go to a friend’s house to play because so many people were coming in and out.  He came home about 5:00 after everything had settled down a bit.  He and Greg built a fire outside:
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Koda has been really mopey.  He was with her all night when everything happened, then I put him in his room, and when he came out he didn’t come to any of us, he was just looking all around the house for mom.
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I just got back from making helping with the funeral arrangements and picking out flowers – On the busiest day of the year for flowers! We got it covered though – going to go with a blue and orange and white, because she LOVED Auburn and Rocky LOVES orange and blue (because of Auburn of course).  Details for the funeral are below:
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Robertsdale United Methodist Church

8:30 Private Family time In the Church
9:00-11:00 am Public Visitation In the Church
11:00 am Funeral service In the Church
Immediately following Burial – Family/Employees Only! Baldwin Memorial Cemetery

In Lieu of flowers Memorial Gifts are requested to go to:
The U B Good scholarship fund at Orange Beach Elementary School
4900 Wilson Blvd
Orange Beach, AL 36561


The Steven Wayne Baker Sea, Sand and Stars Science Center
4900 Wilson Blvd
Orange Beach, AL 36561


Baldwin County Auburn Alumni Club Scholarship Fund
P. O. Box 1322
Foley, AL 36536


The Alabama Golf Association Women’s Scholarship Fund
Attention: Alyson Stuart
1025 Montgomery Hwy
Suite 210
Birmingham, AL 35216
Mr. Baker is going to bring a few friends over for Rocky to play with this afternoon and bring his Valentine’s candy.  We’ve just been relaxing today.  I’m going to continue this blog with everything including memories and pictures for you all, and for me.
There is so much more that’s going through my head that I know I want to write, but I’ll save it for later. 
Thank you to Aunt Sandy and Uncle Dave for these pretty flowers, and Jeff for the chocolates:
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Love you all,
Whitney

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Weekend

Last night was pretty slow.. Donna and Kelly came over to stay with Mom while Greg and I went to Rocky's basketball game. We got back and she had just been sleeping the whole time we were gone. Which is fine, because she needs her rest..and when she is sleeping or napping, she is not feeling any pain.

Greg has been helpful, it is so nice to have him around if only for the weekends. He has been entertaining Rocky and he made a run to Shake's in Foley to get us all concretes and Rocky a milkshake. They were delicious, Mom got a strawberry concrete and ate a little bit of it, but she really enjoyed it! Also, Greg made her smile a few times by acting goofy, and her smiling has been pretty rare the past few days.

The bed in the living room I put right beside the couch so Koda is there on the couch beside her all the time. He's tried to get in the bed with her but theres not enough room.  Last night she went to bed at around 10, and Rocky slept in the living room with her this time.  I had the idea to use Mom and my iPhone 4's with FaceTime and set them up on docks beside each of our beds for the whole night, just in case she needed anything throughout the night. She was actually fine again the whole night even though I was paranoid the whole time and would check on her every noise I heard! I got up at about 6:30 to take Shug out and she got up soon after.

We got her out of her bed and she sat in the wheelchair for a bit but was pretty groggy this morning.  She was in pain when she first woke up so I gave her her morning medicine.  She hasn't complained of pain since, so it is still working well.  She ate some Jell-O bright and early and I turned on the movie Sweet Home Alabama and she stayed up to watch the whole thing.  She then took a nice nap for a few hours, and woke up in pain again.  Greg and Rocky made a trip to Target and Chick-fil-A to pick up some lunch. She ate a couple of nuggets and she loves their lemonade, so she's still working on that.

She has been pretty out of it today, just sort of shaking her head yes and no to questions I ask her. She has talked a little bit but it has been very softly, and she gets kind of confused sometimes.. I read her a Valentine's card from Moni and I got a good smile from her.  I've tried to tell her about everyone that has contacted me, and that makes her happy as well.

She has had one good nap today and is working on another right now.  Rocky has been entertained by Greg today. They went outside to throw the football not long ago, and then Jake and family picked him up to go see the Harlem Globetrotters with the basketball team, so they will have fun tonight. Boudreaux and Margie offered to come over and stay with mom so Greg and I could get out of the house and go have dinner tonight.

Really, I'm counting down the hours until Monday gets here because the doctor is going to come and drain the fluid that has been building up around her stomach.  She is very bloated because of it and I know once it gets drained she will be very relieved. Dad had to have fluid drained twice a week when he was sick and he always felt better after he had that done.

The days have been pretty long recently, but I'm getting through it with all the love that's been sent our way!

Thank you all,

Love,

Whitney

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Tojo & Koda – 2 tired dogs

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Me, Rocky, and Mom in Flagstaff, AZ last month

Friday, February 11, 2011

Feeling Better

Today has been pretty good so far for Mom.  We got the prescriptions yesterday, and so far they have helped.  I was told to record when I give her the medicine and what her pain level is on a scale of 1-10.  That’s really been the main problem this week is the pain, and I hate to see her hurting. Before the medicine she said 7/10, and this morning it was down to a 2/10, so that is great.

We got the equipment delivered yesterday evening, and set up a nice bed in the living room so she can hang out with Rocky and I in the living room instead of being in her room.  She is loving it because it is adjustable so she is like 100 times more comfortable.  I slept in the living room with her last night, and she actually slept the whole night through (minus the DOGS barking at some car turning around in the cul-de-sac)! 

She ended up eating the chicken noodle soup yesterday and last night, and she enjoyed it.  Rocky and I ordered Pizza Hut (his second favorite restaurant, next to Zaxby’s – haha). 

Rocky and I were talking about eyesight the other night, and he was pretty much telling me laser surgery is a good idea because “it’s better in the long-run”, which he also said “I don’t know why Mom doesn’t get her leg fixed, because that will help her in the long run.”  Then I told him – “Well it’s a little more serious than that now”… “It’s more internal now, and that’s not really a good sign.”  So I think he’s getting the picture without me laying everything out there, and telling him straight up.

Also, when had the equipment delivered yesterday, Rocky was more than helpful without me having to ask.  He helped me sheet the bed, and get pillows, and he took a spin in the wheelchair to “test it out” for mom. Worked perfectly!  He asked why we couldn’t just keep the stuff from when dad was sick, but I said well we had no idea we would need it again.  Sad smile He’s been a really good sport throughout all of this.  I think as long as he has his mind off of things he is fine, well – he acts fine.

Our nurse, Ruth, from Covenant came today.  She was super sweet, and is going to be very helpful throughout all of this.  She tested mom’s vitals, and the only thing weird was her blood pressure – both numbers were a little low, but Mom said that has happened in the past in the doctors offices.

Mom ate some chicken and dumplings from Kitty’s today, thanks to Sheryl and Boudreaux.  Moni and Poppa also came to visit and brought Valentines cards and a rose.  Very pretty! She is also trying to keep up with her soap opera “All My Children” and she watched the whole episode today during lunch.

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My boyfriend Greg is on the way down from Auburn this weekend to visit, and I’m so excited to see him. We are going to Rocky’s basketball game tonight while Donna and Kelly come to stay with Mom.  Thank you all for the sweet e-mails and texts, it’s amazing how much support is really out there.  I’m responding to everyone, but it may take a while because I’ve been short on time. But truly THANK YOU! I think I have added everyone that has asked to be on the mailing list for when this is updated.  If you didn’t get the e-mail this time though or want to be added, please let me know – whitney0149@gmail.com

Also we received some beautiful flowers from John, Kathy, Hunter & Hannah and a candle from Traci, Jeff, Chris and Ben.  Thank y’all so much!!

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Mom is taking a nap right now, because our day has been a little busy, and she hasn’t had a chance to really take a good nap yet today.  I’ve been telling her about all the love you guys have showed us, and it’s nice to see that smile on her face.  Hopefully I’ll update tomorrow.  I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!

Love,

Whitney

Thursday, February 10, 2011

So far today

So the Covenant hospice people came today at 9:30.  We met the admissions lady and a social worker.  They went over everything we need to know about the whole process and were very helpful – and will continue to be.  We are expecting to receive some equipment today from them that may make mom more comfortable, which is her main problem right now – she just can’t get comfortable.  She has had a little bit of a hard time making it from the bedroom to the living room, like she needs time to stop and rest while she is walking.  A walker or wheelchair will definitely help that.

They also prescribed a few medicines that hopefully will be able to calm the pain she is having.  I slept in the room with her last night to make sure she didn’t need anything throughout the night.  She really did have a hard time falling asleep, she would sit up every once in a while to drink water, and try again to get in a more comfortable position.  I just can’t imagine how she is feeling right now.  She ended up going to sleep around 12:30 or 1:00 and slept until about 7, which is when I got up. 

She’s eating some right now, she had some Jell-O and some Coke a little bit earlier.  I’m about to go offer her some chicken noodle soup our neighbor Margie brought over yesterday – Thank you! She already talked about how good it is!  Hopefully she’ll be in the mood to eat some!

Koda (our 4 year old golden-doodle) has been SO sweet throughout all of this.  He’s ALWAYS been attached to mom since we got him, and never leaves her side.  He is constantly waiting outside of whichever room she is in for her to come out, and he get SOO excited when he gets to go and see her.  He sleeps with her every night, and is such a good dog!

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Mom, Koda, Tojo, and Rocky – before the Iron Bowl this past year.

If you want to stay updated when I make a post on the blog let me know.  E-mail me at whitney0149@gmail.com, and I think I can have it send e-mails when its updated.  Also I think if you click the “Follow” button in the upper left hand corner it may update you (I’m not too sure though).  Again, I have her phone most of the time with me, so if you want to send her a message my number is 251-978-6600, and again, texting or e-mailing is better and a lot EASIER [than calling]…

Thank you all already for all of the thoughts and prayers, I have already had many thoughtful messages.  Y’all are truly great.

Will update tonight or tomorrow again..

**LOVE**

Whitney

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Mom’s Condition

So, I thought this may be an easier way to share news about mom with everyone at the same time… Here’s the initial story:

Mom has been feeling very tired and lethargic for the past two weeks or so, and we thought it may have something to do with the flu.  She was due for a scan to see how her cancer was doing, and if the recent Chemo treatments have been working on Friday the 4th  I took her in, and we found out the results yesterday…

Not good news…

She has been feeling so bad because her liver is basically failing.  The cancer has pretty much taken over her liver, and there are also signs of it in her abdomen.  She has tried seven different types of Chemo, and the doctor said there’s really nothing else they can do, the Chemo would only make her weaker, and she doesn’t need to be weak right now.  She’s already weak enough really..

Some good news is that she actually has some sort of appetite – the doctor said he really didn’t think she would at this point.  Donna, Moni, and Poppa brought over a BBQ lunch today, and she ate some pork along with some chips.

He gave her a timeline of about 1-3 months. .. Sad smile

The Hospice people are coming tomorrow to run some tests and find out what kind of medication she needs to be on.  Hopefully they can remove some fluid from her stomach, because it is building up a little, and I think that is what is making her so uncomfortable when she comes in the living room with Rocky and me. 

About Rocky: I told him last night that Mom was pretty sick right now, and he said he knows.  I said her liver is not doing very good, but I haven’t really gone into details about what that REALLY means… it’s going to be hard for me to break that to him—I don’t think it has sunk in for me..

I will update this tomorrow, and hopefully often with news because this is easier than talking to people individually.  Also, TEXTING me is easier than talking, because I get kind of shaken up really talking about it.  Also, I have her phone on me a lot of the time, because she doesn’t really feel like talking to people either especially about the subject matter, but I can relay all messages to her.  My number is (251)978-6600, and my e-mail is whitney0149@gmail.com and they both go instantly to my phone.  I’m also managing her e-mail – not that she can’t do any of these things – I just know she doesn’t really want to. 

Love ya’ll! I will update tomorrow, so check back.

I’ll include cute pictures to lighten the mood:

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Rocky, Tojo , and Shug (the PUPPY) – he’s gotten a little big!

 

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Even after the win, the Duck is still Shug's favorite chew toy! #wareagle #wde

Sunday, January 9, 2011

This gas station has "Auburn Door" & "Oregon Door". Surely more people going through the AU side. #wareagle #wde

Saturday, January 8, 2011

1st stop Meteor Crater in #Winslow AZ. Saw four #Auburn fans besides us. Next stop, Flagstaff AZ.

This is the SECOND Auburn billboard we saw in Phoenix!! Have not seen any Oregon signs... #wde #wareagle